I always have been torn between what my family expects of me, and what i really wanted to do.
Family wise, mainly is that i am managing the monthly payment, utilities and whatnot of my house. Currently everything is still manageable, only dampened by the fact that my mum have tendered her resignation letter to her workplace, intending to take care of my older sis's daughter. It's going to be one less income for one. And my sis is still owing me for the past 1 month past payment, which i paid off first. All my money out there, all in loans here and there. Oh my goodness. For this, i will need a fixed monthly income, juz to get thru the monthly pain of paying the bills. No "chin chye" changing of my job, unless my younger sis got a better paid one. Or mayb when finances in my family have stablized somehow. Hmmmmm...
What i really want, hmmmm. This question have been bothering me for the longest time ever. Been thinking back on the days when i was juz a kid, when i first thot of my ambition. It have been so long, that i totally forgotten what exactly is it. Well, nowadays i have been thinkin. That what i want most is mainly, work to go holiday. After holiday, back to working life, until my nxt trip. To places that i have not yet seen, places that is waiting for me to explore. Well, this aint something that is a long term goal, not a solution for a probable future also. But it's something that i really look forward to. Something out of the dreary routine that every workin adult have.
There aint any feasible solution out of this dilemma, where responsibilities to my family dun really leave much alternatives. Mayb after all the finances stuff are more stablized? Or juz pray that money fall from the sky...=)